Unconditional Compassion

compassion

God said, before you pray [I’ll put it in simple English] clean your heart. To me, I think God says, be kind.

I led a very quiet, peaceful life. That is why I found life difficult when I started living in a house full of noisy kids. They irritated me but…

I learnt to see God through the eyes of these kids. Every time they made a lot of noise I would keep calm and think, ‘I have to train myself to be patient and if it is too much I’ll ask them politely to keep it down. There is no shortcut therefore if I want my prayers answered I have to be human.’ Loving everyone is difficult, but I must….let me rewind and come again… must be kind and caring to everybody.

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They say that children sense evil spirits and negative energy, that is why they keep away from bad people. My nephew opened the door and said a loud hallo to me today. He has called my name more than six times. I have also noticed my four year old niece likes to ask me questions and tell me stories. It melts my heart to know that I have improved in handling the kids in the house.

What I have written above does not make me think I have been horrible at all. In fact, when I used to have a place of my own, it is outside my house that all the children of the estate came to play. My ‘estatemates‘ told them to keep it down or go away but I did not because I decided not to.

Now where was I? I was in answered prayers, Love and kindness. What happened to us.To me especially? There was a time I’d alight from a matatu and give my seat to someone who is very old, pregnant or is carrying a baby. These days I get my seat and watch these burdened people enter the matatu miss a seat and walk out then I think, ‘Another matatu will come, they will get in.’ I will continue to sit comfortably.

Why do I pass by the beggars in the street? Is it because they are not genuine anymore? Why do I think that a twenty shilling coin will destroy my future dream? I know very well that not all beggars are fake but I do not take time to look deep into that child’s eyes and read what they say. So what if the beggars collect more money than I have in my purse? Why do I not remember that it is the thought that counts? God says “Give, no matter how little it is. There is more.” Why is my faith so little? Why am I afraid to give? Why do I fear that more will not come? Why do I even pray?”.

So I dropped everything that I thought was preventing my prayers from being answered. Remember when God said that whatever comes out of your mouth is what will save you or finish you? I have tried very much not to make people feel bad. I am trying to surprise people by doing good things for them now and then. Even to the ones I do not like. Remember… God said, “Clean your heart before you come to me”.

I can not approach a woman older than me and offer to help her carry her luggage.. she will refuse because we all look like thieves to her.. Even when we know the person might accept your offer for help we do not ask. How many times does someone ask you for directions? If very few have you ever wondered why? My neighbor asked me a long time ago, “Berina, why are you always annoyed? Why do you walk as if you are going to beat someone? Why don’t you smile?” I thought, ‘Why should I smile, men will think I want them, they will think I am easy.’ I was very young with many responsibilities living with working parents. As I grew older and joined college I started to smile and I realized my hardened heart was softer.

If you do not have anything to give get up and give a hand. Make someone’s work easier by doing it with them or for them. Make God smile. People get tired of asking, learn to do things without being asked. It becomes a habit and becomes easier with time.

I was talking to a friend some time back and complaining about how we live without caring to ask if someone is okay or not, and she replied, “You know, you must always remember the many times people have helped you so if they do not help you now the help they gave you in the past counts.” My stomach churned. I was nauseated and thought. ‘So if someone is starving now you can not give them food because you gave them food some years ago?’ Kindness has no limit. Kindness does not wait for a reward. Give…give…give. I preach all the time that is why you are alive.. and do not give for fame or popularity.

Learn to keep promises because God will never give you what you ask for if you do not keep them. Be kind, let go, give that which you value so much and give wisely. God will give you better. God will give you a thousand fold. The bible speaks the truth because I have watched things unfold and I am still watching.

Be kind. If you think of giving, give, do not change your mind, let people see hope in you. Show people that God lives.

God is real, and He answers prayers that come from a kind heart.

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